Rules:

Philosophy of Rules

There are no rules.
There are always rules.
Somewhere between those 
two rules is the real first 
rule(s) so look there in
- between -
and act (in)appropriately.

Rule for ending my frustration with you

Just do what I tell you to do and keep in mind (as a given) that I am 
usually (or like everyone else want to be) right.  Then act accordingly.

Rules from my family

1.  Mind your p's and q's.  
2.  Always make your bed in the morning.
3.  Someone always has it better than you, and someone 
     always has it worse than you, kiddo.
4.  No one ever said life was fair.
5.  If the mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
6.  Well, you thought wrong.
7.  Just put up with the assholes in life (love the one you're with).
8.  Soulmates are self-defined and not always reciprocated.
9.  Rage fixes everything about as well as duct tape (sort of).
10.  Watching a small child drink a huge glass of chocolate milk is worth
       a penny unless they throw it up.
11.  Always have a quarter on you in case of emergency.  This is 
       to use in a pay phone, so don't spend it on candy.
12.   Take the crackers and condiment packets you find in restaurants.
        You never know when you might need them or when the next
        great depression will be. 
13.   A little white lie never hurt anybody.
14.   Family is important.
15.   Be yourself and be happy.
16.   If all else fails in a social situation, be funny.

Instructions:

I did it!

Just do what I tell you to do.  
Just do what we tell you to do.
Just do what they tell you to do.
Just do what you tell you to do.
Just do what you do.

Found Following Bananas

Place sticker on forehead.  Smile.

Head, shoulder, knees and toes...

Don't listen to the snores in the audience.   Listen instead to the creaks of their better behaved chairs. 

Reinvent the world in your own vision daily.  Then nap.

Bend only to the determined will of the people that you can silence in your head.

Make silent conversation in the manner of ants marching while jammed into the crowd and dripping out of buildings like a hard rain.

If you have nothing nice to see, don't see anything at all.

Throw open the doors, raise the windows, push out the screens, but don't leave every entrance unattended.

LIberate your tongue from it's usual accent at noon on Sundays.

Breathe deep before singing, "Hello!"

Baker's Dozen 

1.  Squeeze more things daily.  
2.  Smile nonstop for an entire day.  
3.  Try to juggle the first three objects you encounter and document it on a
     social media site.  
4.  Circle all the bad words you find in a public dictionary.  Invite others to do
     the same while paying particular attention to whether or not you consider the
     same words bad.
5.  Create your own language.  Get in touch with someone and document
     expressing your most pressing thoughts and feelings in your new language.
6.  Make a diorama of the happiest day of your life.  
7.  Consider the next four things you see.  Make sounds inspired by or using
     them. 
8.  Cut up your junk mail and use the pieces to make something for someone. 
9.  Perform a dance routine based on the hardest experience of your life.
10.  Invent a game you can play anytime by yourself to pass the time.  
11.  Pack a survival kit with all the things you use to survive daily.  Inventory
       this and document it.  Next, add or subtract items based on how you want
       your life to look.  Take another inventory and document.  Repeat annually.
12.  Create a list of three things for each sense that give you joy.
13.  Think carefully about the number thirteen for the next five minutes. 

Nose Kisses!  

[Inspired by my daughter, Lucy] 
Get face to face with another person you love.  Look them in the eyes. While smiling put the tip of your nose to their nose and move your head side to side.
You may have to hold their head to accomplish this successfully.  Pull away quickly and in a high pitched voice say, "nose kisses!" drawing out each word a bit.    

Please note:  Smiling and laughter may result.   

Asking Signs